I was in eighth standard when my Dad (who works in a PSU
bank) used to tell me about auditors coming to bank and being treated like
kings and, that was my first introduction to the world of CA (Chartered
Accountants). And then and there I had decided what I had to do and then had
started the series of fascination of a beautiful and interesting future.
Next when my twelfth class ended I was all set to give my
first shot at being “The Revered” CA. I gave the entrance exam and wohaaa I
cleared it with distinction. People congratulated as if I had done a unique
job, and I, I was on top of the world, feeling as if I had won the First World
War. Now dreams started that I will go to office, own multiple formals, have my
own cabin, attend meetings, will earn MY money and spend it as I wish.
Day of entry to the office, dreams shattered. It was nothing corporate; forget about a
separate cabin, the complete office was fitted into a cabin. Dreams of
meetings, I didn’t even had time to meet my family and friends. People enjoyed
their college life, for me it was a big problem handling it along with office
and coaching classes. My day started and 5 am and I left home around 5:30-6am
and entered back home at 8-9pm. Every day same routine, not for a week, a month,
a year, but for 3 ½ huge years. As for money, I should not expose my profession,
but the amount to be paid per month to trainees (articles as we are called) is
less than the daily wages of a labourer, and we work 6 days a week for 9-10 hours,
(which extends to 12-13 hours for two months in the year, during our peak
period of work). Then we also need to give our exams which are renowned for
their level of difficulty, and for that you literally have to beg for leave
from office from your boss, which though is granted for at maximum a month but
requires you to eat your ego and self respect and literally cry and beg in
front of your boss and which he in the end grants as a mercy to you. Still time went by with many bittersweet
memories.
Then came the second set of exams which I gave in two
groups. Cleared the first group in first attempt and voila I was again up to
the sky, flying away, forgetting all the pains and problems of reaching there.
When the second group came, I tasted my first failure of life and it pained, it
surely did. But when you have your friends along, the pain subsides and you get
the strength to work again. Time flew by, exams finished and the result day
came. This time it was a green signal and a big party time. World War two also finished
finally.
Half battle won, now only left with the last set of exams.
World War three and man it was dreadful. It involved loads and loads of
sleepless nights and tiring classes (in which we slept). Again gave the exams
in two sets and again got success in the first group in first attempt. But as
it is said, history repeats itself and so did it. I again failed in the second
group and this time it was trauma. Not because of failure but because of fear
of studying all those books again. We had a terrible time. A friend of mine (who
I know will understand when she will read this one) was with me during this
journey. This journey of ours was full of dreams as well as hard work. We cried
together, laughed together, studied together, dreamt together. Exams went by well and we were hoping for our
luck to work, which holds an extremely important place in CA exams. Now the
wait for the dreaded results lead to weaving of new dreams in our hearts.
Finally study will be over, we will get into our dream jobs and earn( no mint)
money like anything and we will spend those green and red leaves of money as if
actual leaves flow with the wind…(You feel this is getting over the board, then
no we actually wanted to shop like hell). Corporate lives, two vacations a
year, our due Goa trip (for which we have planned a zillion times), loads of
shopping, exotic luncheons and dinners. Then came the much awaited result
day. We both were in a job interview for
one of our dream companies on the result day. Being separated from our family
and from each other in that procedure, I saw the result on my phone sitting
alone in that room, waiting to be called for my interview while she was sitting
in a bus returning to her home place after her interview. As soon as I saw the
result on my phone, I was called in for the interview. I couldn’t scream in
happiness, I couldn’t hug anyone, I couldn’t cry with happiness, I couldn’t even
inform my family and friends that the battle has been won, World War three is
over. Waited for that round to finish, I found a single acquaintance friend of
mine and she hugged me congratulating me for my success, but I still longed for
the feeling of being congratulated by loved ones. I called my companion of this
war, my dear friend and we literally shouted on the phones, I am a CA, we were
the newly crowned CAs and we were loving it. Interviews
got finished, results came and I was rejected. The feeling of happiness got
somewhere submerged as I got to know the truth that I was still not worth that
job, my dream job. Family members chided my disappointment saying that many
more opportunities will come, this was one job, there are many out there. You
are qualified professional now and now there’s no looking back Happiness again
came back, I was joyous. Congratulations messages and calls flowed in. Facebook
wall full of wishes. My parents and
brother boasted of me. People who never
even knew I were also living in that house came and congratulated me as if was
the new selected minister from the vicinity. People looked at me with a new
respect. My views were now considered important. So much happiness that all the
pains of training, studying, that monotonous routine, those failures,
everything was forgotten.
Its been four months since me qualifying and I’m still
jobless and so is my dear friend. Getting frustrated each day, that was all
that pain and struggle of five years worth it??? Has it been the biggest wrong decision
of my life??? Will it always be a regret that we chose this course?? College mates
who enjoyed those years when we CA students slogged our asses out, are well employed
and earning well and we are looking for jobs endlessly. Juniors from school who are still doing B.Tech
from not so very reputed colleges are also already placed through their campus
and we who are among the few qualified professionals are still waking up
aimlessly every day and lazing our day out and sleeping again dissatisfied. Though
this journey has given me the world’s best friends for which I will always be
thankful. But still the basic need is not being fulfilled, there are no jobs
out there, and there’s no fun waiting every day, hoping to listen to some good
news.
Family members and friends console that this is your time, enjoy
yourself. You have worked very hard for many
years, now have a relaxed time. You will
get jobs, such processes take time, have patience. But how to make them understand
that it is easier said than done. Its very difficult to get up every day with
nothing to do, logging in 10 times a day to check if you have got any important
mail. Passing the day with TV, oversleeping, facebook (on which I log in 20 times a day,
just to see that there’s no activity there also. It feels as if no one other
than me has time to log in and idle away on fb also).
Though I sound like the world’s biggest pessimist in this
post, still trying my level best to keep patience and faith and wait for this
fourth world war to end too. Waiting for the day, when I will again be so happy
that I will forget these days also and will once again feel on the top of the
world.
